It's meme time.

So, evidently the rules are you pick a few of these and then write out your answers. Then you add three more "if I could be a's" at the end. Then you send it on down the line.

Ok.

Here goes nothing.

And by nothing, I mean lots and lots of Zombie Crap!

The (@#$%!!!ing, F--- This List) List

If I could be a scientist...
If I could be a farmer...
If I could be a musician...
If I could be a doctor...
If I could be a painter...
If I could be a gardener...
If I could be a missionary...
If I could be a chef...
If I could be an architect...
If I could be a linguist...
If I could be a psychologist...
If I could be a librarian...
If I could be an athlete...
If I could be a lawyer...
If I could be an innkeeper...
If I could be a professor...
If I could be a writer...
If I could be a llama-rider...(by Ogre)
If I could be a bonnie pirate...(By Teach)
If I could be a servicemember...(By Jeremy)
If I could be a business owner...(By Blue 944)
If I could be an actor... (By Blue 944)
If I could be an agent...(By KelBel)
If I could be video game designer...(By KelBel)
If I could be a comic book artist...(By Stoli)
If I could be a hooker...(By Pollo Loco)
If I could be a crack addict (by Elizabeth)
If I could be a porn star (by Elizabeth)
If I could be a f*cking meme...(Pisser)
If I could be a serial killer...(Pisser)
If I could be a dung beetle...(Pisser)
If I could be an ice cream man...(Zombie Flyboy)
If I could be a dictator of a small country...(Zombie Flyboy)
If I could be a cartoon character...(Zombie Flyboy)


If I could be a scientist, I would capture and study the monstrous rat thing that lives next door and discover what in the hell it actually is. Is it a deformed dog as I've been led to believe, or something much worse such as a twisted, mutated, deaf fat albino child? This is a mystery for the ages, and as a scientist, I would get to the bottom of it.

If I could be a missionary, I'd walk around at the bar and tell the girls I was so good at the sex that a position was named after me. Then they would be so impressed that they would beg to come home with me and let me demonstrate. Or not.

If I could be a porn star, Actually, I am a porn star. I make movies under the name T.T. Boy. If you ever get the chance, check out my work.

If I could be a dung beetle, I'd be the happiest creature on earth. I can't even imagine the sheer joy I would get from making a big ball of dung and then hurling it at someone I dislike. Piling up dung in front of someone's door for them to step in, putting dung in their mailbox, burying their car in dung, man, that would sure be the life. I don't know how long a dung beetle lives. Probably not long. But it's quality, not quantity that counts right?

If I could be a writer, I'd not be boring you to death with these lame answers. Heh.

Ok. That's all. I don't know who I should pass this meme along to, so if you want to pick it up and run with it fine.

And if you don't that's fine too.

Later on pussbags!

This post brought to you in part by Pisser, and also by the letters, F. A. R. and T.